Dear Josh,
I could probably just tell you this but I cant. There are things in life that we cant explain. There are people who aren't a part of the picture but make the picture complete. To start from the beginning, I don't actually belong to this town. When i came here i made a friends with whom i could cover my scars. Scars of a life left behind. Scars of being a coward. Scars being selfish. There is something none of my friends here know... I ran away from my life 3 years ago, leaving behind a 5 month old son and my husband. He has no idea of where i went or why i went away. Till this day, neither do i. I wanted to live,enjoy and relish life. But that's a past i wished to bury. Until i met you. You made me feel empty and happy. Empty because your warmth made me miss my son. Happy because there was finally someone to love me enough. There was magic in the way we talked, walked and just knew each other. I thought, i could possibly push my past and move on. A couple of days before i met your mom, Eric , my husband showed up in front of me. He was angry. Very mad at me, but he knew there was no way to get me back. I just prayed to God for my son. There wasn't much i could do going back there. I knew i couldn't take care of him or be the mother, the way yours is to you. Meeting your mother, broke me down. I couldn't hold it back anymore and so I told her the truth.
She told me that her son had fallen madly in Love with me, but when i told her i had a life i couldn't return to she didn't seem too happy. She pleaded that i at least tell you the truth and let you decide. She told me how you had left home, looking for friends and people to care for you. She told me about those days when after school, you came back home crying and begged to God to show you some friends. She told me that after 8 long years she had seen her son smile, laugh and actually live life. Casey, Sam, Ric. These were the names she always heard her son say.So, I took a few days away from you to decide on whether i should tell you or not. But those days made me yearn for you more than i ever knew. I wanted to run back to you and just with you at Eddie's and sip hot coffee and just talk.
This i could have just told you, but then i couldn't sum up the courage to face you, face your innocent liking for me. For whatever it is worth, I love you!
Love,
Your Casey!
P.S: I am waiting for you... You will come, wont you?
Reading this, I cried. I just crumbled and broke down. I don't know if it was for the time i had wasted waiting to ask her or that this was a love i couldn't have. I had much longed for a friend and there she was, that friend that i had always dreamt of. There was a life waiting for me in exactly 30 minutes. A life that would change it all for me.There she was waiting for me, My Casey. Or was she that strong? Maybe she needed someone. Just like me, she needed someone too. An anchor for a life that had no direction. Yes, She needed me like i needed her!
I was there at her doorstep. right at 8'o clock. I straightened out my shirt, brushed my hair and rang the bell. Once... Twice...Thrice. There wasn't response. So, i trying pushing the door. It was open. 'Ha.. already in love are we?' I thought. Silently , I tip-toed into the house. It was strangely filled with nothing but wallpapers. There was a bottle of wine on the table beside the Sofa. So she had laid out the evening for us. An evening that was a first for two yearning souls. I walked to her. I was there, just a breathe away from her , just a second away from telling her that i didn't care about her past and that now we can just be together forever!
Right there on the couch was My Casandra, drenched in a pool of blood, lying lifeless on the sofa.... It took me a few seconds to understand reality... There she was , and all i could muster as i knelt down beside her was 'I love you too Casandra.. I love you too'
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